quiet paws.

Last time Jack inspired us with valuable guidance on how to embrace your inner man and live your life in true Bauer style. We have here now another series of pointers straight from the school of Bauer to assist with life’s challenges and unknown dilemmas.

Demeanour: Remaining calm under pressure should be an objective at all times. There is nothing to be gained from giving in to panic or losing yourself to fear. Such actions can only result in failure or a loss of respect in your abilities. Display courage and maintain confidence in all that you do, making sure not to cross that line between confidence and arrogance. If your ego steps into overdrive it will not impress anyone and will actually become a barrier to whatever it is you are trying to achieve, whether that is to make a decision or lead others to action.

Politeness and respect for other people should also be naturally invoked in your dealings with others. Sometimes though your frustration may get the better of you or you may be irritated by other people not aligning themselves to the appropriate objective. Try your best at these times to at least apply civility.

Fitness: By all means keep yourself fit and healthy, and if possible a lean, mean, fighting machine. One of the best ways to stay fit and healthy is to work in a job that requires you to stay at peak physical fitness and keeps you constantly on the move. Such practical fitness is also highly likely to garner you much appreciation and praise from those of the gender you are trying to impress.

Excellent physical activities include running, jogging, lifting weights, boxing and no doubt some self-centering meditation would also come in handy. As for what to wear if you need to do off-the-job exercising, stick to basic exercise attire like t-shirt and shorts. Never ever wear lycra unless you are infiltrating a lycra factory, and even then your motives may be questioned.

Relationships: Be loyal to those you trust and love, and always be mindful of the fact that relationships consist of two separate but equal parts. The status of any relationship should always be known by both parties, whether that be married, exclusive partners or separated, the lines and boundaries should be as clearly defined as possible.

If you find yourself in a relationship which continues to develop and emotions are deeply felt, by all means enter into a commitment. When you are with someone expressing your feelings is fine, but remember that there is a time and a place for certain types of affectionate displays. Make the most of time spent in eachother’s company because you never know when your time together may be unexpectedly cut short.

Career: By all means have a career, have a purpose to your life, but never forget that there is more to life than work. While it is not always possible for life to be held in perfect balance with time spent at work, even when priority skews heavily to one extreme for a time, it should always return to some semblance of practicality. Family and other personal relationships are a vital part of life, and should remain a priority as much as possible.

Ethics: Remain loyal to yourself and to your moral code, compromise should never be an option. As much as is possible, treat all other people with respect and civility. Of course this guideline should be ignored if you are dealing with dirty rotten turncoats. Be guided by your heart and your head and apply thought processes that could best be described as warm logic. While the application of cold, hard logic is an ultimate goal, in reality human factors always come into play making it impossible to be completely dispassionate.

…So where does this leave today’s modern man? In life, there are much worse goals to aspire to than trying to be just a little like Jack, and who knows perhaps with some Bauer guidance the world will be just that little bit better…

History has seen many different types of men come and go, some of which have raised serious questions about what it means to be a man. Probably the most disturbing trends have been those which have come close to annihilating the masculine from the male of the species.

Each age of man has had its positive and negative elements, but until now these ages have been incomplete evolutionary cycles. It is during this, the fourth age of man, that we finally draw towards a more complete picture of man.

The Chivalrous age of men:
Enter Exhibit A, the Gentlemen. Best demonstrated by Cary Grant.

Debonair, refined and decidedly charming are just some of the qualities which define this man. He was intelligent, displayed impeccable manners, possessed a most excellent wit and always dressed appropriately. The gentleman was constantly aware of this place in the world and was often considered to be the provider for his family.

The Introspective age of men:
Enter Exhibit B, the Sensitive New Age Guy. Best demonstrated by Ross Geller from Friends.

SNAGs were all about feelings, being attuned to their emotions and staying in touch with their feminine sides. Men were encouraged to share their innermost thoughts, fears, hopes and dreams with those of the opposite sex. The idea was that in becoming more aware of and developing a greater understanding of their emotions, they would garner more favour from women and connect on a deeper level. Often unthreatening and unintimidating both in personality and physical presence, they were known for their sensitive dispositions.

The Extrospective age of men:
Enter Exhibit C, the Metrosexual. Best demonstrated by David Beckham.

Sometime after the initial craze of SNAGS had all but disappeared from most social circles, a new ‘ideal’ man appeared. Entitled the metrosexual, these men were encouraged to look after their skin, pluck their eyebrows, wear jewellery, style their hair, dress in the latest fashions such as form fitting coloured jeans and slimfit shirts, wax away chest hair and maintain an almost boyish physique. It is during this age that the sexes became truly difficult to separate.

The Retrospective age of men:
Enter Exhibit D, a return to the Real Man. Best demonstrated by Jack Bauer (as portrayed by Kiefer Sutherland) from 24.

Real men no longer have to be ashamed to exist. While they have always existed in the shadows, they are being encouraged to step forward. Thank you Mr Jack Bauer.

Jack is unashamedly masculine. He serves his workplace loyally but first and foremost he serves his country and ultimately his President (unless the President is a dirty rotten turncoat). As for personal relationships – when Jack loves, he loves completely and passionately. However he is also well versed in the ways of loss. This well-rounded experience of life and its opposing emotions means that Jack has an innate ability to understand people and their motivations. He would do anything possible to help those he cares about without expecting the same in return. This loyalty is built from his strong ethical code which he would rather die than betray.

He is fit, healthy and generally aware of his strengths and weaknesses without feeling the need to talk incessantly about either. He is tirelessly resourceful and always ready for action, but always finds time to treat people with an appropriate amount of respect. Dressing appropriately for any given situation whether that be in jeans, cargos or a suit, nothing is overly fussy or too complicated. For Jack clothing is simply functional.

While he is always as neat and clean as circumstances allow, Jack doesn’t get too caught up in grooming and personal appearance. His hair is simple and recognising that is isn’t always possible to shave in every 24 hour period he has even been known to let his facial hair grow from time to time.

The composite picture created by Jack Bauer represents the perfect blend of all the positive elements from the ages of men which have come before. This man’s time is now.

The future of man…
Now there is nothing wrong with good hygiene, dressing well and taking care of one’s skin, but somewhere along the way the true essence of what it means to be a man has been eroded away and the line between the sexes has become increasingly blurred. While the previous ages of man will always appeal and continue to be desired by some women, the vast majority of women would not want to see the extinction of all things masculine.

The cycle of these evolutionary ages may not have touched all men, but those that have been swept up or passed by must be left feeling somewhat confused by all the mixed messages. Be a man and yet don’t be a man, care about your appearance but don’t care too much, be stylish but not too trendy. Men are obviously free to choose and follow many different paths but perhaps more attention should be given to the fundamental question of what it means to be a man.

As with so many dilemmas, simplicity is often the best answer. So ignore the trends, be true to yourself, and never neglect your masculinity. If that has you being even a little like Jack Bauer than that can’t be half bad.