When travelling on public transport, please refrain from eating potato chips (of the crispy variety). This rule applies equally to all varieties, including crinkle cut, thin cut, baked, fried, corn and organic. Please note this is not a definitive list and all other relevant varieties must also be avoided.
The pungent aromas which can issue from said foodstuff (especially when of a gourmet flavour) may illicit negative reactions from your fellow passengers. Also the loud CRUNCH on each mouthful of chips, followed by the seemingly never ending chewing noises, may lead to a sudden (and perhaps for you, unexpected) violent outburst from travelling companions.
Please refer to the following detailed explanation for more information:
- Yes we all have to travel to work somehow.
- Yes the bus / train is often the best (or cheapest) way to get to work.
- Yes the selected bus / train is part of a public transport network.
- Yes catching the selected bus / train does mean you’ll have to deal with members of ‘the public’.
- Yes we all hate catching the bus / train.
- Yes sometimes we can get hungry on the bus / train.
- But NO we should never combine eating pungent, noisy food with travelling on the bus / train. Such behaviour may lead to civil unrest.
All we ask for is a little consideration for other travellers. We ask that you wait until you get home to eat so that you can enjoy a decent meal. After all you don’t want to spoil your appetite for the main meal. Alternatively you may simply decide to wait until you get home and then crunch away on all the chips you want until you can eat no more.
If while in transit, you feel that you are fading fast and believe that you really have no choice but to eat something during your journey, please select something which both lacks an offensive odour, and which will not require you to produce any audible eating noises.
For future reference, if you do not cease and desist this behaviour you may just find those chips, or your head, are thrown out (or through) the window of the moving bus / train. That may just put a permanent dampener on your future chip eating efforts.